Learning to Improv...

Adapt or perish, now as ever, is nature's inexorable imperative.
H.G. Wells

Plan. Organize. Structure. Calculate. Routine. Strategy. Perfect. These are all words I thrive on.
Chaos. Improvise. Confusion. Disarray. Noise. Unknown. These are all words that frighten me.

I am a perfectionist. A planner. Ok, a control freak. I plan everything. Before I make a phone call, I rehearse everything I am going to say. (Yes, I am WEIRD.) But I'm learning. Some of the best times I've ever had in my life have been the times where I've relaxed, been unstructured and just lived. My rigidity is, over time, being worn away, probably by my being worn out by trying futilely to oversee and direct everything.

This was put to the test a week ago. A friend called me on a Friday night at 6:30 and asked me to do a mud run with her. Before I could help myself, I said yes. She hung up so quick, I couldn't say "but wait...." I had no time to do any of my pre-race rituals. I couldn't take back all the food I ate for dinner for a salad. I couldn't put in a couple extra miles!! I had no time to obsess!!! In less than 12 hours, I'd be at the race!!

"It is God who arms me with strength and makes my way perfect."
Psalm 18:32

I did it. I tested myself! And I passed!!!!

Don't think... JUST DO!!!

The blog title is apparently a quote attributed to Horace, a Roman poet. I often say this to myself and dish it out to others. It's perfect. This week has been a tough week for me, and my thoughts have turned again and again to being tired, worn out, feeling beaten up, wanting to just be done. Whenever I have a week like this I immediately return to my mental checklist:

1. sleep-- am I getting 8 hours every night? Not even close this week.  I think I have AVERAGED 5.5 every night!!!
2. diet-- cheating? I easily fall into the "one little ____ (insert favorite cheat food here), won't hurt" mentality that WILL snowball me into a full blown reversion back to the old lifestyle.
3. rest day-- as in, how long has it been since my last rest day?  Or my problem sometimes is.. too many rest days in a row.  My body hurt for one of the first times ever!!!  I needed a rest day.. and more than one!!
4. time of the month-- sorry, but hormones make a difference; but it's NOT an excuse to be a slacker

So, no words of encouragement in this post, no inspirational how to's. No, this time I'm just going to say it:  

There are so many days when I don't feel like getting up early to workout. Some mornings I don't feel like running. Many times after work I just feel like going home and watching mindless TV and not doing my burpees. And I often feel like eating whatever the heck I want to. I don't always feel like eating healthy, smaller portions. And there are times when I feel as if I want to just quit. 

Well, guess what. Feelings are not reality. We can feel a lot of things that aren't true. That's when it's time to stop thinking about how you feel and just do what needs to be done. 

"No excuses. Just do the work."

-Shalane Flanagan